What can you say about pizza that hasn’t already been said. No, seriously, tell me, I have hit a writers mental roadblock in food descriptiveness. I still like to eat this stuff but the creative spark to write about it all seems to have deemed a bit. I mean, I have been doing this since 2011 for f**ks sake! At some point one can hit a wall and I think this is mine….with pizza of all things! I guess it seems like the perfect time to succumb to our eventual robot overloads and do the AI thing to see what it can come up with. I’ve tried it before for giggles but how will it work for writers block. Let’s see what we get!

Pizza: A Timeless Culinary Icon

“Pizza, with its origins dating back to ancient times, has secured its place as a beloved culinary icon worldwide. This versatile dish consists of a thin, crispy crust topped with flavorsome tomato sauce, gooey cheese, and an endless array of toppings, making it a customizable delight for all palates. From the classic Margherita to the innovative combinations of gourmet pizzerias, pizza caters to a vast spectrum of tastes and preferences.

The beauty of pizza lies in its simplicity and universality. Whether enjoyed in a bustling pizzeria, a cozy home setting, or as a quick slice on the go, pizza transcends cultural boundaries and brings people together through shared enjoyment of a comforting meal. It serves as a canvas for culinary experimentation while also honoring tradition and nostalgia.

In today's fast-paced world, pizza remains a steadfast go-to option for a convenient and satisfying meal. Its enduring popularity is a testament to its widespread appeal and unwavering ability to evolve with the times. Pizza's legacy as a staple comfort food is a testament to its enduring popularity, making it a timeless favorite for generations to come.”

Hmmm, interesting. Lots of generic words and commas going on there. Turns out there are more than one of these AI generators out there so let’s see what another one comes up with. Fun!

“Pizza, an icon of gastronomy, transcends mere sustenance; it embodies a cultural phenomenon, a culinary canvas, and a symbol of shared joy. Its origins, rooted in the humble kitchens of Naples, Italy, belie its global influence. At its core, pizza is a harmony of simplicity and complexity—the marriage of crust, sauce, cheese, and toppings, each element offering a symphony of flavors and textures.

The crust, whether thin and crispy or thick and chewy, provides the foundation upon which the masterpiece unfolds. It is a testament to the artistry of dough-making, where precise fermentation and baking techniques yield perfection.

Sauce, the soul of pizza, infuses every bite with tangy sweetness, complementing the richness of melted cheese. From the traditional marinara to bold pesto or barbecue, the sauce sets the tone for the culinary journey ahead.

Cheese, a melty blanket of indulgence, binds the elements together in harmonious unity. Mozzarella, Parmesan, or goat cheese—each variety adds its unique character to the ensemble.

Toppings, the pièce de résistance, offer infinite possibilities for creativity and expression. From classic pepperoni to exotic pineapple, they invite exploration and personalization, ensuring that every pizza is a reflection of its creator and a delight to its consumer.

In essence, pizza is more than a dish—it is an experience, a celebration of culinary artistry, and a testament to the universal language of food.”

Ok then, I did a request for a 200 word treatise on pizza and they both seem sort of the same. Though I got a title with the first one but not the second. They feel a little basic and I guess generic. Let’s see if I can get something the closer to how I normally look at things. You know, something with a little snark.

“Ah, pizza, the ubiquitous emblem of culinary convenience. Born from the necessity of feeding hungry Neapolitans quickly, it has evolved into a global phenomenon, loved by many and scrutinized by purists. Its appeal lies not only in its taste but in its versatility—whether you're a gourmet enthusiast or a midnight snacker, there's a pizza for every occasion.

But let's be real here. Pizza isn't exactly haute cuisine. It's the ultimate comfort food, the go-to option when you can't be bothered to cook or when your cravings demand instant gratification. And let's not even get started on the endless debates over toppings. Pineapple on pizza? Some call it sacrilege, others call it genius.

Sure, pizza has its merits. It brings people together, sparks heated debates, and fills bellies with cheesy goodness. But let's not pretend it's anything more than what it is—a deliciously greasy, carb-loaded indulgence that we just can't get enough of. So, whether you're a die-hard traditionalist or a fearless experimenter, raise a slice to pizza—the ultimate guilty pleasure.”

Yeah, no. I don’t think it quite understands the query of snark or sarcasm. It reads a little more conversationally at least but does seem like a compilation of pulled quotes from encyclopedic descriptions of pizza. I’m sure one day this is gonna reach the heights where we don’t know the difference. I know some think it is happening now, and maybe it is in an instance or two, but sometimes you read stuff that just feels like it lacks feeling or as if they have never had pizza! And until they have it, they just won’t get it.

Till then, back to my journey through pizza in this town that isn’t for the drunk and stoned, well, actually ALL pizza is for the drunk and stoned but one is not necessarily one of those and wants to actually enjoy what they are eating without having to be under the influence. Which brings me to Olympia Pizza & Spaghetti House. This place is a reasonably short walk from my abode but it is attached to a bar and I was initially like, ugh, no, not another one, but the pictures online (from regular folk!) looked decent enough I thought I’d give it a try.

What better way that to try than go with my regular choice of toppings and get a large pepperoni, sausage and mushroom. What you say? Where is the pepperoni and mushroom, I only see sausage in that picture. Seems this place does it like a variation of Chicago deep dish, it is all about the layering. On top was the sausage, then the cheese, then some pepperoni, a little more cheese and then some mushroom and sauce. One on top of the other. It is a pretty neat way to do it as you get a some of each topping in most every bite. And they don’t skimp on the toppings here! Big chunks of sausage, large pepperoni slices and a bushel of shrooms. Not to mention the cheese. Heaps of it to give all the gooey layers of flavor a cheese fiend like me can enjoy. Seriously, look at it! Have you ever seen such big sausage chunks? The answer is no, no you haven’t. Gotta say, it was unexpected and a delight considering my bitchy snobbiness about pizza in this town.

I also liked the crust. It is kind of like a focaccia bread, but not quite as pillowy. Slightly denser but still fluffy enough to not feel like you are eating undercooked dough. It also had a great buttery flavor especially along the crisp edges and we all know I like me some butter! The thicker crust really works here as you need it to withstand all those toppings. Plus they get the bottom just crisp enough to hold up to everything on it without suffering the dreaded “soggy tip syndrome” many pizzas can succumb to. This pizza hits a perfect balance between thin and thick crust and, for me, stands above a lot of those other just okay pizzas I have had and rant about in this town.

And they also do these great little personal, three topping size pizzas (more than three will cost extra). Reminds me a lot of the personal pan pizzas you used to get from Pizza Hut—remember them? Same layering, same great crust. Here I got shredded pepperoni which I really liked as the small pieces got all crisped up like some kind of tasty pepperoni bacon thing. And we all know I likes me some bacon! (Right after butter) Not to mention, because the pieces are thick and stacked, I could get three meals out of this. Or two if I’m feeling gluttonous.

It is not all doom and gloom and basic pizza-ness. Olympia Pizza is giving me hope among the vast pizza offerings around town, which is good seeing has how a couple of good pizza spots have recently closed up shop. Fortunately this place is going strong at each of their locations. You get some lovely buttery crust and generous helpings of toppings and cheese at some fairly decent pricing. The three topping large will run you about $30 and the personal about $12 but considering the size and thickness of the slices you are going to get multiple meals out of each of them and well all know I likes me some dining bargains! (Next to butter and bacon) Lucky for me this place is a short walk away! Or maybe not. I have been there more than once, or twice, or three or….whatever. That is the advantage I do have over the AI, I can actually eat and enjoy the pizza. It can only surmise and write generic copy about it. Score one for humankind bitches!!